Habitual Behavior

“Habit is habit and not to be flung out the window, but coaxed downstairs a step at a time.” ~Mark Twain

~Mark Twain was one of my Mom’s favorite authors. She would say quotes from memory to me from the novels she had read by him. I loved hearing her recite them. The above is one of my favorites. My beautiful Mom would tell me it takes time to change habitual behavior and to celebrate even the littlest of progress. Every inch forward is a victory when you are going for a mile. Of course, she was lovingly right. How I treasure her life lessons, more so now than ever before. And now, I am reading Mark Twain more. Thanks Mom!

~Self discovery is not a race. Time is a transient stop on the locomotive of life. The route can be arduous. Breaking bad habits is laborious. Reversing habitual behavior is not for the weak minded. They cannot be taken on with the attitude of instant gratification. Putting in the work and waiting for change to happen can be exhausting. Especially the little habits over time. Those are the most vexing. They sneak up and one day snare like a snake. Realizing the trap is there is perhaps the most important step to modifying behavior. Another relevant quote is from Warren Buffet. “Chains of habit are too light to be felt until they are too heavy to be broken.” It is natural over time to want to evolve into someone better.

~ Starting small with life altering decisions was the best way for me to go. Even a few tiny ones to begin with can make all the difference and set one up for success. About two years ago, I started to change the way I eat. It was overwhelming at first. All the foods I love were essentially not healthy. Pasta, rice, sugary snacks, and bread especially were among my favs. Cutting out carbs is not easy. But, I am in this for the long haul. I began to cut back on the portions and drank more water. Actually, I drink tons of water. It’s good for the skin too 🙂 I didn’t do a fad diet. I systematically made adjustments little by little. Now, I can proudly say we don’t even buy breads, bagels, or pasta. That stuff is never in our house anymore.

~Nothing is as easy as it seems though, right? There is another reason not to have those temptations in the house. If it is right in front of me constantly, I am bound to break all the progress I have made. Surrounding myself with the tantalizing foods does not show how strong I am. On the contrary, knowing my strengths and weaknesses is key. It is easier to abstain if I am not floating in its environment. No one wants to set themselves up to be purposely sabotaged. If someone gave up smoking, it would not be conducive to be around the smoke. The smoke would pull the habitualness of what used to be. Same with food for me. I know when I am safe from myself. I choose not to be engulfed with enticing smells or wants.

~Quitting something cold turkey helps some as well. Whatever the method, to stop is easy. Maintaining that lifestyle over the rest of one’s time here on earth is much harder. I do pray for my best being with lupus. Eating healthy is an essential part of trying to prevent flares. Me being me, I keep journals. I read my success stories as fuel for the future. I know from my past that I can overcome as long as I stay willing. Strange cool thing is: I don’t crave the sandwiches or bagels anymore. I don’t crave bread at all. But, I still have a sweet tooth. So, instead of quitting that one entirely, I do allow a decadent treat once a week. After two years of trying not to want sugar, it appears as if the cavity causing snacks are here to stay.

~Big honest self-assessments should be inventoried. What needs to be changed, what doesn’t? What are the good habits that can live on? Remember habits can be virtuous too. Cultivate those to the best of your ability. Celebrate what you are great at. Don’t stay in the negative space. The habits that are hard to decipher between good and bad are the ones to pray about. And, some habits are nothing to worry about at all. Write them down on paper, look at them, and decide whether you can live with them or not. It is not up to anyone else. If you can proudly look yourself in the mirror and say there is nothing that needs to change, then that is great. More power to you. If you cannot, more power to you. The key is to want to be better, to do better not just for yourself but for the others you love and care about. God bless 🙂 #LupusMariposa® #Habits #GoodOrBad #Change4Better #LupusChanges #LifeChanges #HabitualBehavior