Inner Peace
~~~I saw a friend of mine who had not seen me in a while. We said hello and gave each other hugs. Immediately, she tells me that there is something different about me. She says I look brighter. I crack jokes saying maybe it is the new eating plan or the fact that I am having a good day. That is something to smile about. She insists that it is something else. At this point, I am wondering if this woman is empathic. If feels like she is starring right into my soul the way my Mom used to. There is no way I can lie to her without giving myself away. So, I stop laughing. I look directly back at her and say “Yes, I am different. I have been working on the things you cannot see.”
~~~She clocks her head to the side with an inquisitive look and I keep going. We have never had a conversation on this level. But, I can tell she wants to hear more. I tell her I have been working on my precious heart, repairing years and years of horrific damage. I have been working on my tender soul, setting it free from the heavy chains I put myself in with relentless guilt. I have been working on my impressionable mind, releasing it from all the overthinking and overcrowding of thoughts that bring me down and do not bring me joy. I am doing all this with God’s help. He strengthens me daily. Without Him, none of this progress would be possible.
~~~She says nothing for a second. Then, with a big smile tells me that is wonderful and she has to start doing the same. She has Lupus as well. When we would see each other, we would pass along anything that was working for us with our diseases or anything that wasn’t. This was something very cool to pass on. Healing from the inside out is invisible just like the auto immune diseases themselves. People may notice a change but it will be hard at first for them to put their finger on it. The healing is invisible to the naked eye. I believe God IS healing me one day at a time on His schedule. I am not to be pitied. It is not a case of if I pray harder God will heal my body. God is healing me. He is making a difference in my life. I believe the Lord wanted to show me some things. He wanted me close to Him again.
~~~Lupus and other invisible diseases are ugly business. It is not all sunshine and rainbows. When the Lord gave me the courage to start this page, our mission statement (for lack of better term) was to help others know they are not alone. That is what I am here for. God wants me to help one person at a time to know there is hope. Not all of my posts will be the happiest ones but they are Lupus. I did go through hell and back. I share tidbits of my life but I have not gotten to all of it of course. Overtime, I am will be sharing more. I have been around the world and back. Home is where I was saved and home is where the Lord brought me back to finish what He started. I have come full circle. Wisdom comes with age. It comes from having nothing but time well spent with God. #LupusMariposa® #InvisibleHealing #HeartSoulMind #InnerPeace
