Dare To Dream
~~My heart has no business entertaining hatred for what God is doing in me, because as I identity who I am in Christ, there is no room for guilt and shame from another. No room to feel insignificant because someone else is jealous or delights in feeling tall when he or she makes me feel small. This is much harder said than done. It can knock me off my feet when someone spits a cruel word my way, but I am not defined by other people’s opinions. A Holy God who loves me defines me. As the haters do their thing, let it be an opportunity to celebrate what God is doing within me. The Divine is orchestrating my days, not my haters. A Giver of dreams, hopes, and courage leads me.
~~The above paragraph comes from an amazing book I am currently reading by Tiffany Bluhm. It is called “She Dreams.” I am only half way through but every word, I feel could have been written for me. In college, I majored in journalism and minored in Spanish. At the time, my dream was to be a bilingual journalist and work for a bilingual magazine or something along those lines. I got my degree going part time while serving my country in the US Navy. I finally got my degree. But, unfortunately, I also got Lupus. I got it hard. I felt as if Lupus had stolen my dreams and everything it took me years to accomplish. There was no room for my dream with my health being so fragile. In the beginning, when doctors did not know what they were doing and my organs started failing, I spent more time in the hospital than I did at home.
~~Fast forward a few years, a bunch of medications and now a diagnosis, it is what it is. I was still not dreaming or believing I could. I was not really talking to God either though. Right there was my problem. My life did not start turning around until I remembered who was there waiting for me to return. It is funny how the ones I thought would understand, did not. The ones I thought would be there for me, were not. I had a total breakdown. I was down on my knees crying to the Lord. I was tired. I was broken. The Almighty picked me up and put His arms around me. God was my friend. He was being there for me. He was trying to help me slowly put the pieces of my shattered world back together again. As I grew stronger everyday in my relationship with the Lord, He was showing me in ways only He can that He is working on my life.
~~This blog was a dream. It started from feeling lonely, broken, and hurt by others and not wanting anyone else to feel that cruelty or pain. To wanting to provide hope, love, and a community where we could all pray for each other. If I could be there and help one person, then my dream was worth it. That was and still is my attitude. God is here with us. God is here with me as I write. My life is changing. I will continue to serve the Lord and follow Him. I encourage anyone with a dream to chase after it. God can change lives. He has changed mine. But, be prepared. Not everyone will be happy for you. If something good happens, that is when the haters start coming out of the closets. I know from experience that staying focused on Jesus and His love for me and my love for Him, that everything else will fall to the wastelands. My God and I will succeed in love.
~~I am also finding that it is important for me to be prepared for the next steps so I do not fall back down the staircase. I need to be ready for the following stage when God calls me for it. It is a blessing to serve the Lord but if I lose the opportunity because I am not listening to His will, then I will have missed out. I cannot let the cruel intentions of others infiltrate my heart or my mind. I must keep both pure and strong for God and myself. This way, I can continue to march onward up those stairs all the way to the top right where God wants me. He wants me to succeed. He wants me to dream. We all have talents that He wants us to use for His glory. So, go ahead and dream. Do not let anyone stop you. 🦋#LupusMariposa® #DreamerInGodsLove #NoMatch4Haters #StayStrong
