Against All Odds

Orange and black butterfly on white flower.

“….It’s Hard To Protect Something So Fleeting” ~ Jackson Parr

~The Monarch is subjected by insurmountable odds from the beginning of its life to the end. Its delicate nature is tested at every turn it attempts to make. The world seems hardwired to destroy it. I remember finding one in my driveway. The poor thing was on the pavement with half a wing missing. I wanted to try and help. I researched how to repair a broken butterfly wing. The process took more skillful finesse that I had and the petrified creature soon died. I was heartbroken. I learned after that if you hold a butterfly upside down it actually calms them along with turning the lights off or dimming them. I had my lights on bright so I could see what I was doing and did not know to hold the butterfly that way.

~ I thought of my heart and the way it needs to be protected not only from myself but from the elements all around me. I remember each event that caused the commiseration. The decisions I made that had a lasting impression on others. The decisions that others made that had a lasting impression on me. It is sad when a soft heart becomes a hard shell just to survive. When it has to adapt to its new environment. The heart will flee from all it has known to all it has to maintain. It becomes more of an automatic response. My fleeting heart can only care for what is in front of me at that moment not behind me. It takes incredible strength to be authentically you when the world tries to tear you down for it. A broken heart much like a broken wing is almost impossible to repair. It is so much better to stay intact in the first place.

~ I’m not sure anyone gets through this life without some damage. Maybe there are some that can never relate to this type of adaptation. There are some days I joke with my Lupus and tell it to just try me. It won’t win. There are other days I am not so daring. It’s like holding a match to a flame. Do I want to see it blow up in my face? No, not really. So I don’t egg it on. But, is egging it on actually what I am doing as opposed to feeling strong on those days and letting Lupus know it can’t take me down. Am I that caged bird watching the world go by or do I have wings to fly my own way. I feel much like that butterfly with insurmountable odds. I just want to make it longer than my disease.

~ When the Monarch makes its epic journey from northern America down to Mexico each year, it makes many pit stops along the route. In fact, it is not the original one that makes it all the way down. But, each one carves a way for the next. It is a continuous cycle of life and struggle. It doesn’t diminish the beauty or strength of this insect at all. For me, it lends more intrigue to how amazing the perseverance is to have to travel from one weathered spot to the next. This flying creation knows it only has so long and makes the most of his path. It keeps going. It keeps soaring. Yes, their lifespan is short. But it is also vibrant, meaningful, and has a distinct purpose. It’s creation was made by God for this. Just like me. I am made for a reason and a season. If I don’t stray from my path, my destiny can be fulfilled. I am going to follow the road map God has given me directions for…

~ Of course I am. #LupusMariposa®

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